41 days and counting....

In 41 days I will be headed to Puerto Rico.  My friend TC and I are taking our moms on a much needed vacation.  We're going to Puerto Rico and spending 8 glorious days in the sunshine.  TC and I have splurged a bit on the trip. 

I'm really looking forward to it.  I have started to go to the website of La Concha Resort and look at the pictures.  I know that they are stock photos, so they may look nicer than the space could ever look, but I'm so excited. I'm excited to be in the sunshine.  I'm excited to unplug my phone and computer and enjoy 8 incredible days away from work. 

Mostly I am really excited that I am able to take this vacation and that I'm able to give my mom this vacation.  My mom deeply deserves a real vacation away from kids and sickness and hospitals.  She would never do this for herself nor could she afford it.  I'm glad that I'm in a place where I can do this for my mom.  I know that TC feels the same way about her mother. 

I have to admit that I have been kind of obnoxious about the whole thing.  I've been telling people at work about this vacation for almost 8 months now and making sure that everyone is aware of the fact that I plan on unplugging during this vacation. 

This morning it was 10 degrees outside but felt like -6 with the windchill.  In Puerto Rico it was 74 degrees. 

41 days...and counting...

52 Lists: Ways in Which You Can Love Others

52 Lists

Week Six// List The Ways In Which You Can Love Others

I can love others by.....

... writing handwritten thank you notes.

 

...pausing and listening to the answer when I ask someone the question "how are you?"

...saying please and thank you for all requests no matter how large or small and no matter from whom I am asking.

 

...giving strong, solid, and loving hugs.

 

...sharing my feelings and thoughts with those I love.

 

...asking others about themselves.

 

...getting out of my own head and paying attention to the needs of those around me.

 

...giving people space when they need it and being present when they need me.

 

...sending youtube videos that they would love.

 

...sharing the things you see with them to let them know you are thinking about them.

 

...saying I love you.

 

...buying them their favorite candy just because you were thinking about them. 

 

...sharing jokes and memories to make them smile.

 

...being a safe port from the raging storms.

 

...showing kindness even when I don't want to be kind.

 

...taking time to listen even when my schedule is crazy busy.

 

...stopping by their apartment just because I was in the neighborhood. 

 

...remembering their birthday and other special dates.

 

...walking their dog when they have to work late.

 

...sending a random text message to say hi.

...laughing with them. 

...giving them what they need not what you would need if you were them.

...cherishing their flaws.

Early morning stillness

Last night it started to snow.  Unlike lots of places in the country, we haven't gotten that much snow this winter...at least not yet.  We are supposed to get 5-10 inches over the course of the day, so I'll have some shoveling to do later. 

There is special quiet that happens in the early morning when the newly fallen snow is on the ground.  The snow acts almost like soundproofing.  Everything is just a bit softer and a bit stiller.  This morning when I took Sally out for her morning constitutional I was struck by the pre-dawn light and the incredible stillness. 

There is something so beautiful about that moment before the entire world comes alive; before that moment when it feels like you are the only person awake in the whole world. I love the morning for that reason.  It feels like a fresh start and a new beginning.  It feels like I can take a breath and actually pause before the go,go,go of the day begins. 

52 Lists: Things I am grateful for

52 Lists

Week Five// List The Things You Are Grateful For

I am grateful ...

...for the fact that my family, despite not having gone to college themselves, always told me that I was going to go to college 

...that Mary Leger believed in me enough my first year of high school to give me a scholarship to SLTP and to then pay for my attendance when I couldn't afford to go
 

...that I met Jim Fitzgerald and have had the great honor and privilege to be loved, supported, mentored, and challenged by him
 

...for the MayFlower singers - Lisa, Jeff, and Jason - and the great adventures we had finding Tam the goat
 

...that I moved around a lot when I was younger and changed schools because it made me more resilient

...for the laughter and love of my beautiful niece

...for my involvement in the Student Leadership Training Program - the skills I've learned, the people I've met, and the laughter we've shared has been a foundation for me to stand on

...my best friend - my life is fuller and more complete because of him.

...for my friends.  I am a lucky woman because I have been blessed with some incredible people in my life (past and present) and I am lucky enough to call them friends. Each of you has helped me grow and has made my life fuller.

... to have a reliable car, a wonderful home, a cute dog, a regular paycheck, and a job that challenges and fulfills me (most of the time)

... that I can find humor even in the darkest moments, a skill that I learned from my mother.  No matter what was going on in our lives, there was always laughter and music in our life. 

... for the storehouse of random lyrics that I have in my head and the eclectic taste in music that I have cultivated over the many years. 

...for Thursday night karaoke and the friends, laughter, and ridiculousness it has afford me

...for the upper valley aquatic center

...for pandora, netflix, facebook, pinterest and other media that have made some things in life easier.

...for books and the adventures I've gone on and the characters I've met between the pages

... for lists and file folders and labelmakers and color coding and other terribly ridiculous organization tools

... for YouTube videos

... finding joy in small moments

...for the walk to work and back home because it gives me time to decompress and process

...for a good glass of wine or an excellent Cosmo

... for having learned some things the hard way and for working to make a difference so that other young people don't have to learn the hard way

... for twizzlers and reese's peanut butter cups and jelly belly sour jellybeans

...for Santa Claus and the holiday season

...for moments where I have laughed so hard that my stomach ached, for moments when I have cried so hard that my eyes got swollen, for moments when I have loved so deeply my heart burst, for moments when I have been so filled with anger that I saw red, for moments when I have been in deep despair that it felt like I would never get out of the darkness...all of those moments have taught me how to live and to feel and to share and to love.  They weren't easy but in retrospect I am grateful for these moments because to me they mean that I am living and engaging with the world.  They mean that I am facing my fears.  These moments and the lessons learned from them are what make up who I am.

2014 Goals Update

Happy February!

2014 has started off fast and furious.  So far it has been a largely positive year  There have been ups and downs but I have felt great about it. I have steadily taken small steps towards My various goals.  I realize that most of them are long term habit changes rather than finite actions.  Although, come warmer weather, I hope to knock out a bunch of the items on this list.

Having set some hopes and goals for myself, I have found myself more involved in my own life, taking care of myself, and living in the present.  I needed to refocus my life some and build in more meaning and more intention.  For some reason in 2013, I managed to let a lot of time slip away without engagement, intention, or meaning. I feel more fully awake this year so far.  Lots of great change happened last year but I think I let it drive me rather than driving it.  I let the changes and the "busyness" overwhelm me and take over.  I spent a lot of time worrying and dwelling on every little thing.  I let anger overcome me and I let things that were outside of my control impact my behavior and how I view the world.  The goal is to prevent that from happening again this year - so far, so good.  (*knock on wood*)

With that - here's the February update

In Progress

• Continue improving my healthy habits - Good going on this front.  I've been exercising, eating well, reflecting, journaling (and blogging), managing my money, keeping the house clean, spending time with friends...etc...
• Apply to graduate school - I'm doing it!  I am applying to MBA programs.  This is a decision that surprised me too but I believe that it is the right decision.  Maybe I'll write about that at some point because I have lots of thoughts (positive and conflicting) about the reasons behind this decision and some of the forces behind it.  I think it would be surprising to many that money is not a motivator in this decision at all but maybe my own bias is showing.  I'm applying to "executive" programs which are designed to complete in 2 years while working.  I'm applying to MIT, NYU, Cornell, UVA and UPenn.  I've got open houses scheduled, and interviews, and the GMATs.  I have to write my essays and finish my applications.  There is a lot to do but I'm working on it.  When I write my update on March 1, I should be able to say that I have finished all of the applications. 
• Take better care of my teeth - check! I love my sonicare toothbrush.  Now I need to make a dentist appointment - blech!
• Read a book every 2 weeks - Every 2 weeks might have been a bit ambitious while also trying to applying to grad school.  I have been reading though and I renewed my library card.  My inclination is to buy more and more books but that is silly when there is a wonderful place called a library where I can get them for FREE.  Besides, until I have a home with a dedicated library I just don't have the space for more books.  What am I reading right now? Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (yes, I had to copy and paste his last name).  It is an incredible book and it is totally blowing my mind. 
• Increase my investment and ownership in SLTP - The book I  am reading is an excellent segue into this goal.  The concept of flow is on of the foundations of how SLTP is built and why it works.  Reading the actual theoretical foundations behind it is investing more in the program.  It is helping me understand the way we work and why we work more deeply.  I also was able to recruit East Hartford High students back to the program and that has been awesome.  I am regularly finding ways to invest in the program and to help however I am able.  I am bringing colleagues with me to the Interlead tomorrow to get a feel for the program and to show them what it is that I do and what this SLTP is that I spend so much time on. 
• Take a trip to NYC - I'll be in New York on February 11 and February 12.  Done! I'm going for my NYU interview and a couple of information sessions but there will be enough time in between the events that I hope to be able to see some people while I'm there.  
• Take a baking class at King Arthur Flour - AC and I are going to take a class in March...or maybe April but we have talked about it and are working on identifying the class.  This will be happening!
• Increase student contact at work - This I am doing!  I created student specific office hours.  I've been reaching out to students for conversations.  These are check-ins with no agenda other than to connect.  I've been going to student organization meetings and finding other ways to connect.  It has been great and what I love about the work.  It is the reason that we do it.  I think the further away from on-the-ground student work we get the easier it becomes to forget that they are the reason for the work.  Student learning and well-being is our why and it is what needs to be at the forefront of our minds all the time.
• Practice Kindness - Every day I am practicing kindness and compassion as a mind set.  One of the things that crystallized for me is that practicing kindness doesn't mean that I don't say the challenging things, it means that I say them in the right way, to the right person, for the right reasons. 

Stalled - Going to try and pick these back up in February...

• Research and work towards becoming a Zumba instructor.
• Hang stuff on walls.
• Read the New York Times on Sundays and attempt the crossword puzzle.  
  
• Take myself on a date once a month.  
• Paint the wood furniture. 

Off Season

• See firewater in Providence. 
• Spend more time in Ogunquit this summer. 
• Ride a roller coaster. 
• Go to the Big E. 
• Go apple and berry picking.  
• Buy a bike. 
• Run in the Electric Run 5K in Boston in October.